One of my all time most viewed posts is on why I wear skirts all the time instead of pants. Personally, I always enjoy hearing about why other ladies wear skirts and dresses, and I guess you readers do too! Recently a questions was posed in my FB fashion group (which you are welcome to join!) asking why we dress modestly, any struggles we faced, and how modest dressing has changed us.
My previous skirts post was written a little over a year ago, so one would imagine that my views on modesty and skirt wearing have not changed much, right? Well I didn’t think so either, but upon reflection I realized I have changed and so have my modesty standards. Won’t you join me as I explain further my convictions regarding skirts?
I grew up with modesty enforced but was not skirts only. Typical outfits for me were more focussed on proper coverage and being obvious that I was a little girl. I always wore a tank top under my shirts for coverage, and often wore frills, bows, pink, etc. Sure, there were times that i desired to wear clothes like other kids, but my mom would tell me gently that those were not appropriate for little girls. By the time I started high school I began dressing more immodestly (and my parents had bigger issues to deal with so my clothing choices were not really a priority for them). To make a long story short, over the last 14 years I have held various personal modesty standards based on my own comfort level and what was trendy at the time (remember skinny jeans? I LIVED in them).
When I got married at age 22 I began to be more careful with what I wore so as not to attract attention from other men. Now I know this is a touchy subject for a lot of women because they feel like it is not their problem if men are looking at them lustfully. While I agree in part, I have to argue that we need to be mindful AT ALL TIMES about how we portray ourselves, regardless of our gender. I talked about modesty being equal to respect in another post.
Previously I stated that my skirt convictions were not based off of Deuteronomy 22:5 A woman shall not wear a man’s garment, nor shall a man put on a woman’s cloak, for whoever does these things is an abomination to the Lord your God, but lately I have been seeing the validity of that verse. I have seen many women wearing pants in a modest and in a feminine way, but they aren’t really my style. I don’t think pants specifically are men’s clothes, but in a society that sees women determined to disregard traditional gender roles, wearing a skirt makes me feel like I am outwardly stating that I believe in God’s wisdom when He made men and women different.
Modest dressing, specifically skirts and dresses, has been the gateway to exploring Biblical femininity for me. We know that God made men and women differently, but besides the obvious physical differences, what else, and how can I as a woman and wife emulate that? My clothing choices serve as a visible reminder to me that I am NOT like other women, and that is a good thing. I chose to get married, and with the grace of God, I have been becoming a better wife. Did skirts make me that way? No, of course not. But wearing skirts instead of pants (traditionally men’s clothes) reminds me of the qualities I strive to live by as a woman of God. In case you are curious, I believe a godly woman has a gentle spirit (1 Peter 3-4), submissive (Ephesians 5:22-23), diligent (Ecclesiastes 9:10), among others.
Hopefully that explains a bit more about why I choose to wear skirts and dresses instead of pants. Know that it hasn’t always been easy for me, and I have struggled against my convictions and what the world says. There have been times I felt isolated, weird, and like an attention seeker because of my clothing choices. In my area women do not really wear skirts or dresses, especially not modest styles. When others are wearing casual jeans and a tee shirt, I am the one looking “fancy” in a dress. I don’t cast judgement on others for their choices, because it truly is not my place to tell them what is right and wrong. My convictions are just that…mine. I can’t force an unbeliever or sister in Christ to change the way she dresses, but I can live my life as an example of biblical womanhood in hopes of leading by example. I have had many conversations with all types of women when they ask or comment on my clothing. Will someone become a Christian on the spot and turn their life around instantly because I wear a modest dress? Likely not! But my end goal isn’t to convert as many people as possible. It is to live my life in a way that is pleasing to God, so that my quiet lifestyle will be something people are curious about, and a conversation about my faith can begin.